Thursday, April 10, 2014

Some Wednesday Funny

Yesterday, I went to pick up Braxton and Zoe from my mom's house.   My niece, Iyanna, (who if you can remember has been a genius since she was born and is also 2) was also there.

Iyanna:  "Auntie, who peed on your shirt?"

Me: "Huh, what are you talking about?"

Iyanna:  "Who peed?"  *and points at my shirt*

And that's how I found out my boobs were leaking.

Friday, April 4, 2014

She Knows What She is Talking About (Sometimes)

As in she, I mean my mom.  My momma is full of advice- although most of it unsolicited.  We were talking about Zoe and how she's a completely different child with her- more independent, etc.  In particular, we were talking about Zoe's bedtime routine at home (or lack thereof).

At mom's house, (Mom is our daycare provider) Zoe is in a sleep routine.  She puts her in the bed and Zoe stays in the bed, she doesn't need any help going to sleep.  At home, Zoe was like a wild boar at bed time. We had to run her around the house and fight with her for several hours to get her to lay in the bed, which often ended up with my husband laying in her bed with her.

Before I went to the hospital to give birth to B, I'd ordered bunk beds for her room.  (Remember, she'd been sleeping in a baby bed in our room because I wasn't ready to let go.) They came while we were in the hospital and I still wasn't in a rush to put her in her room because I didn't want her to feel as if the baby was ousting her.

Once my husband put up her beds, we started the transition... some nights he would sleep with her until she fell asleep, sometimes, we would give her her portable DVD player and let her watch movies until she conked out.

My kid is a kid who will stay up as long as a movie is playing so that would mean she wouldn't get to sleep some nights until after 2 and 3 a.m.

The whole time my mom kept saying, "put her in the bed.  By herself.  Turn out the lights."

I thought that was cruel and unusual punishment. We are in an apartment, which although pretty big, we aren't separated by any floors.  I felt like she'd feel left out because we were living life without her- out here with the baby.

Earlier this week, I decided we had to get better. Zoe needed adequate sleep and my husband did too because he's been getting up going to work every morning.  My maternity leave will be up so, we needed a routine.

Beginning on Monday, we started her 10:00 bed time.  (I want to eventually work my way to 9:30 but we have to start out slow for success).  We make sure everything is done before then and at 9:00, I start counting down time ("Zoe, in an hour, you'll have to go to bed.")  She has no concept of time at 2 years old but if Zoe thinks she has a say, it makes for less opportunity for a meltdown in the long run.  I've learned that flexing my adult control does nothing but make a flip out session and #ain'tnobodygottimeforthat.

At 10:00, she kisses me and the baby goodnight and my husband takes her into her room and reads her a  story.  After that he says her prayers with her and turns out the lights.  The first three nights, Zoe got out of the bed a few times and had to be put back in.  Wednesday, I threatened to pop her on her butt and she didn't get back out (I can count on my fingers her number of spankings).   Yesterday, she didn't get out at all.  She's been doing pretty good.  I told her this weekend, I"d get her a treat.  She has no idea what I'm talking about.  :)

Monday, March 31, 2014

4 Weeks

Mothering Braxton has been taking up ALL of my time.  I rarely get free moments.  I'm exhausted and it's a miracle from God that I function and still go out of the house looking like something.  :) 

While I am on maternity leave, Zoe has still been going to my mom's house as she does while we're at work.  There is NO WAY I'd be able to handle a two year old and a baby. 

The first few days when we came home from the hospital, she wasn't feeling him much.  We could tell she was competing but practically overnight, she morphed into a big sister.  I joke that Braxton had better develop and get a thick skin fast because Zoe doesn't recognize that he is a baby.  She thinks he's her equal and of course I try to keep a trained eye on her but I can't stop everything - ie her LOUD MOUTH.  She gets in his face and talks so loud!  She also says "Look at me, bra-yer. I'm dancing."  She has no clue that he can't really look at her.  It's adorable when she waves at him and expects him to wave back though.  

I've also been busy taking him to doctor's appointments.  We've had doctors and hospital follow ups practically every week.  We've also had to take him to Indianapolis (about an hour and 45 min drive- no traffic).  It turns out my kiddo had increased levels of Tyrosine in his blood.  So far, the tests have been coming back reflecting that he's doing well. His liver is functioning as normal.  He doesn't have Tyrosinemia I.  On the outside, he is a completely healthy (big) boy.  I would've never suspected a thing.  We remain encouraged and I love his doctor in Indianapolis, she keeps us informed and she communicates everything with us.  

We're nursing ( A LOT ) - this boy eats constantly.  My boobs are huge and my freezer is full of milk. My milk supply is a lot better than it was with Zoe. He's already 10 pounds 3 oz.  I went to Target last week and had a leaky accident there.  Funny thing is, I was only a teensy bit embarrassed. He was knocked out so I couldn't sneak into a fitting room to feed him.  I just continued my shopping and figured I'd address it when I got home.  I cannot wear nursing pads because they itch so much.  I'd rather deal with the leakies than scratch in public.  

He's had a few crying spells, last night he cried for probably close to two hours... there was nothing we could do to stop it.  We just kept trying things.  Finally J got him to sleep by putting him in the car seat and lifting it over and over.  My child is strange.  :) 

His cries don't do the same thing to me as Zoe's did.  I couldn't take her crying - it would send me into an instant panic and speed up my heart rate.  I'm more mellowed out with Brax, he's already getting second child syndrome.  

I'm doing ok on the weight loss.  I"ll be glad when my doctor allows me to exercise again.  I had some complications healing from my cesarean so I still haven't gotten the ok.  I think my nursing constantly, no real time to eat anything but Halos (mandarin oranges) has assisted in that.  I drink liquids frequently also.  

I miss blogging and I think of things to write often but when the baby cries, all of that goes out of the window.   I am hoping to get back on it once I return to work, those lunch hours helped me out.  :) 

Saturday, March 8, 2014

And Then There Were 4...

We got up at 4 o'clock in the morning to drop off Zoe and get to the hospital to meet our baby.

Braxton Rhys (pronounced "Reeze") was born on 2/26/14 at 8: 52 a.m. by scheduled Cesarean.  The surgery went off without a hitch and I was pretty calm up until when they wheeled me back to the operating table.  That's when it occurred to me that I was about to be cut open.  It freaked me out a little a lot. I thought, "I should've just pushed this baby out."

I was asked multiple times whether I was sure I wanted my tubes tied and because of the amount of times they asked, my yeses began to have question marks at the end.  My husband's didn't though, thankfully, his certainty reinforced my confidence in having it done.

Braxton was 8 pounds 1 1/2 ounces and 22 inches long.  I really don't remember much about the delivery, just bits and pieces because I was high out of my mind. 

This hospital was different than where I gave birth to Zoe and I wasn't a fan of how they did the delivery.  After the baby was born, he and J were immediately whisked out of the operating room and I was there alone to endure getting my tubes tied and being sewn up, by myself.  Again, thankfully I was high out of my mind because I really don't remember much about it. 

Once I was able to get into recovery, I was able to get a good look at my little boy.  He's beautiful and there are four of us now. (WOW!)

I still cannot believe it.  We stayed in the hospital two days longer than I thought- They had trouble keeping Braxton's temperature up and my blood pressure kept going up, then the second night, I got a fever of 101.  I'm pretty sure that was my milk coming in because it also happened with Zoe.  By that last day, I was past ready.  I missed my husband, my little girl and the hospital was not up to par- the food was disgusting and I just felt gross in there.  My particularly "sunny" attitude had been replaced by storm clouds and I'm pretty sure I made the bad patient list.

But alas, we are home now and my husband took off 2 1/ 2 weeks to be with us.  It's been great having him home because he has been taking care of the home, the store runs, etc. I am still recovering, am sore, and am slow moving. 

Braxton is sweet, he hardly cries and he lets his sister kiss him without complaint.  He eats constantly and my boobs are hating life right now.... I couldn't have asked for a better son! 

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

My Confessions

I read this post today and was absolutely tickled by hers and the other readers' confessions, so I thought... why not do my own?  Thanks for the idea, Sarah.

I posted these on hers:

1.  As much as I love that I'm pregnant with our son, I want this pregnancy to be at it's end so I can get back on the thin wagon. I'm tired of huffing and puffing and not being able to fit into my clothes.

2.  These last few weeks of pregnancy, I've been sucking major as a mom. My kid doesn't want to eat the dinner I cooked her, so I let her eat cereal (see-yul as she says), Pop-Tarts, and various other crap for dinner.


3.  I hide in the bathroom pretending to use the toilet but I'm really just sitting there, reading my cell phone.  I just need a few minutes of peace. 

4.  I avoid walking past desks, coming out of the stalls in the bathroom if someone is at the sink to avoid people asking about my pregnancy.  I'm so sick of answering the same questions, over and over.

weather girl eyeroll

5.  While getting a manicure and pedicure this weekend, I put on my headphones like I was listening to music, but I wasn't listening to anything. I just didn't feel like talking, answering more questions about my pregnancy. 

6.  I make people over in my head.

7.  I have unkind dialogue going on in my head when someone annoying is talking to me (this is especially true for my co-worker who whines too much.  STOP TALKING TO ME!)

Young Johnny Depp

Monday, February 17, 2014


I am a black girl married to a black boy.  That is obvious but also something I've never had to be necessarily conscientious of.  We both have college degrees.  I was raised in a two parent household, as well as my husband (for the most part)

Although neither of us were raised in the "hood", we also don't come from silver spoon beginnings.  My lower class environments were multicultural.

In school, I've always been one of few black children in the classroom.  I was always accepted into "other" cultures.  I was deemed "safe". 

Don't get me wrong, I've had a few obviously racist encounters, and when I say a few, I mean less than four in my 33 years of life.  Because this is something that didn't occur in my life often, it was really easy for me to shrug it off as ignorance.

I'm saying all those things to reinforce the fact that I'm a black girl has always been something that is in the back of my mind.  

And then I was told that I'd be having a son....

When I first heard the news, I was excited, especially for my husband.  I know he wanted a son even though he told me he didn't matter.  

But the more I thought about it, the more scared I got. 

I learned in my Criminal Justice courses that it is our little boys that are locked up far quicker and for longer sentences than any other racial group.

It is our little boys that are shooting each other for nothing.

It is our little boys that are sometimes targeted and singled out, only because of the color of their skin.

And it frightens me. 

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

37 Weeks

I'm 37 weeks today.... Zoe was born at 37 weeks.  So far the baby's bag is packed, and mine still has nothing in it. 

I'm trifling that way.

We had a doctor's appointment yesterday and today, I went to see the high risk doctor.  He wanted to double check the baby and monitor my fibroid growth.  He's 7.1 pounds so far and pretty much on the same track as Zoe, she was 7.4 when she was born. 

My son has a name as of yesterday.  I found a middle name to go with the first name my husband was stuck on giving him! 

We're keeping it mum until he gets here. I don't want anyone raining on my parade by frowning up their face or wrinkling their brows when I say what it is...because that is what happened with Channing.  Honestly!  Too many negative reactions and people struggling to say it properly made me no longer like that name (and I grew so tired of it). 

We saw him on the 3D ultrasound today.  He's got someone's full nose (I blame J and he blames me) and I do believe my full lips-mine are big on the top and bottom. 

I've been thinking that labor was going to occur soon- between the bathroom visits and the exhaust and the baby movements but I could be wrong, he could just wait until 2/26 when the C-section is scheduled. 

Next Friday will be my last day of work per my doctor's instructions. She said I needed rest because C-section #2 + Tubal Ligation could make for a rough recovery and I needed my rest. 
No argument here. 

I have had a sore throat for the past two days and I'm really tired.

I'm ready to see this boy and introduce him to my husband and his big sister (who still isn't bubbling over with excitement that he's coming, btw).